Am I suicidal? Someone just said I am.. well I don't think I am anyway.. but honestly without me..the world would be a better place.. I wished I wasn't born then I wouldnt have to hurt my girlfriend all the time. I bet you're just like..you freaking dickhead, toughen up and change.. I don't know.. Everything I do just ends up hurting her. What a failure right? Yeah.. But I don't wanna die just yet..coz of one obvious reason..I have an awesome girlfriend.. I don't have the guts to suicide anyway.. I'm too scared.. I'm sounding suicidal now right? Seriously though, every single thing I do never ever makes anyone's day better, never makes anyone smile. All I do is ruin their day, well actually I'm probs too insignificant to ruin their day, but I'm pretty sure it ruins their moment.
I wonder if I'll ever do anything that will benefit others..especially her.. Hopefully I'll change soon. Nothing I ever do is ever constructive, never helps anyone. That sucks.
Wednesday 23 March 2011
Gee Gee..I did it again =_=
Once again..I pissed her off big time.. Mmm my church friend is right..I was born to piss people off. Once again my jealously has made her angry..You peepz must be like..this kid has gotta be the shittest boyfriend in the world. Yea I probs am..but lets hope not.. Got lectured by a little girl..about being over protective..you think I am? I'm beginning to think that little girl is right..I probs am.
Wish I could be a better guy..better suited for my awesome girlfriend eh? But..I blame my parents..giving me all the shit left over genes to make me who I am..diuu.. Ahhh..she's got three bruised toes now wtf..had one before now she's got three and she says it really hurts to walk..I reckon she should go hospital to get it checked out..they might be fractured and will just get worse if she just keep walking.
Who the hell makes their girlfriend cry..seriously..they've gotta be the biggest pricks in the world. That biggest prick is mee.. Me = Ian .. Maybe I ain't cut out to be a boyfriend maybe I'm cut out to be..nothing. But I try anyway and it's been failing pretty bad these few days. Will I ever change? Hopefully. Will I obtain a higher self esteem? Most likely not. Will I ever get less jealous? Maybe. Will I ever be a better guy? Hopefully.
To my lovely girlfriend:
I'm sorry I ruined your day when you were trying to be optimistic all day. Even though you lost your basketball game. I'm sorry I can't make you happy, but I'll try to change into a better guy. I hope your toes get better ^_^. Thank you coming to my corridor today. I felt so happy when I saw you >.< haha
I love you..with all my heart and all my soul. I'm sorry.
Wish I could be a better guy..better suited for my awesome girlfriend eh? But..I blame my parents..giving me all the shit left over genes to make me who I am..diuu.. Ahhh..she's got three bruised toes now wtf..had one before now she's got three and she says it really hurts to walk..I reckon she should go hospital to get it checked out..they might be fractured and will just get worse if she just keep walking.
Who the hell makes their girlfriend cry..seriously..they've gotta be the biggest pricks in the world. That biggest prick is mee.. Me = Ian .. Maybe I ain't cut out to be a boyfriend maybe I'm cut out to be..nothing. But I try anyway and it's been failing pretty bad these few days. Will I ever change? Hopefully. Will I obtain a higher self esteem? Most likely not. Will I ever get less jealous? Maybe. Will I ever be a better guy? Hopefully.
To my lovely girlfriend:
I'm sorry I ruined your day when you were trying to be optimistic all day. Even though you lost your basketball game. I'm sorry I can't make you happy, but I'll try to change into a better guy. I hope your toes get better ^_^. Thank you coming to my corridor today. I felt so happy when I saw you >.< haha
I love you..with all my heart and all my soul. I'm sorry.
Tuesday 22 March 2011
Man..I feel like shit..maybe coz I am..
Not much to say..what a shitty day..spent like..2mins with her today..how gay is that right? I guess I got pissed off over nothing but..meh that's who I am..she knows that..but she does that shit in front of me anyway..why? How should I know..maybe..coz I'm..sigh..oh well..shit happens right? xD should be glad that she's mine yea? haha xD..why does a love song come on while I'm writing this..makes me miss her now..
Sigh..not in the mood for anything now..just wanna go out and lie down and look at the stars..but there's no stars == how gay..should stop crying and be a man right?lmao..流血不流淚..you know? haha xD..mm that's the motto of a true man lmao..obviously im not a true man..ohh weellll..
Well if you ever read this..you know how I feel like..like a piece of motherfucken shit..probs coz I am one but whatever,,
Byebyee
Sigh..not in the mood for anything now..just wanna go out and lie down and look at the stars..but there's no stars == how gay..should stop crying and be a man right?lmao..流血不流淚..you know? haha xD..mm that's the motto of a true man lmao..obviously im not a true man..ohh weellll..
Well if you ever read this..you know how I feel like..like a piece of motherfucken shit..probs coz I am one but whatever,,
Byebyee
Friday 18 March 2011
Wednesday 16 March 2011
Win. Win. Win.
Hahaha.. So good today xD. First, got our specialist math assignments back..finally..after handing up like two weeks ago and teacher have marked them. Well, you know? New SACE uses this system of marking by judging if the marker thinks you understand the work you're doing in class or not and how well you understand, then they'll mark the bits A or B or C or D or E right..and there was 5 things to mark for this assignment.. and I guess I'm just too pro..all 5 of mine were A's.. ^___^
Second, volunteered to run the 3km for sports day for my house to get point, although I really only did it to skip class. I swear there were like 30+ people going to run in the Open guys one but then the lunch bell rang and half the people left coz they didn't wanna run during their lunch time. So left with like 17 people, three year 12's dropped out after like 4 laps and then 2 of my friends got disqualified because they missed a lap so it wasn't counted..and my pro-ness let me lap my little indian friend hahahaha..and he was supposed to be pretty good at running. Came fifth..not bad right? haha although it was outta 12 people if you don't count the people who dropped out and got disqualified.
Man.. Should really be doing my english assignment, I've already done a bit just then but felt like posting heh heh.. Freaking specialist math teacher tells us we got a test on Friday.. How gay is that? English assignment due and math test on the same day..
YYEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW... Sports day tomorrow..mmm maybe I'll do some events that don't have enough people just to get some point so water house will win AGAIN.. Since I came to this school..water house hasn't lost a sports day yet, I guess I'm just too...BEAST..heh heh heh..yea man..this is how I get my self-esteem up temporarily. Oh..I couldn't even spell "temporarily" had to use google lmao..
Anyways..Cya later bruuu.. Wish me luck for ass kicking on sports day =D
Second, volunteered to run the 3km for sports day for my house to get point, although I really only did it to skip class. I swear there were like 30+ people going to run in the Open guys one but then the lunch bell rang and half the people left coz they didn't wanna run during their lunch time. So left with like 17 people, three year 12's dropped out after like 4 laps and then 2 of my friends got disqualified because they missed a lap so it wasn't counted..and my pro-ness let me lap my little indian friend hahahaha..and he was supposed to be pretty good at running. Came fifth..not bad right? haha although it was outta 12 people if you don't count the people who dropped out and got disqualified.
Man.. Should really be doing my english assignment, I've already done a bit just then but felt like posting heh heh.. Freaking specialist math teacher tells us we got a test on Friday.. How gay is that? English assignment due and math test on the same day..
YYEEEEWWWWWWWWWWW... Sports day tomorrow..mmm maybe I'll do some events that don't have enough people just to get some point so water house will win AGAIN.. Since I came to this school..water house hasn't lost a sports day yet, I guess I'm just too...BEAST..heh heh heh..yea man..this is how I get my self-esteem up temporarily. Oh..I couldn't even spell "temporarily" had to use google lmao..
Anyways..Cya later bruuu.. Wish me luck for ass kicking on sports day =D
Tuesday 15 March 2011
Soooo bored.
Man..wth.. English assignment due friday..and I've done like nothing, some kid told me was due last week so I rushed it but I did it completely wrong how gay. Missed half my lunch getting english teacher to explain to me hahaha, and she kept using words I dunno. How gay is that eh? I really should just use a diary for this, but then I have palmer hyperhydrosis which means my hands get abnormally sweaty. Yeah yeah,, laugh all you want. Freaking gay man.. Even my exam paper gets like wrinkly and damp and I cant write on it properly.
Wow..in chem today my friend found a hair sticking outta my cheek/chin and was like 1cm+ in length ahhaha sooo funny.. coz my bro gets them as well lmao.. My friend tried to pull it out right, and failed.. THEN MY HAIR TURNED CURLY OMG MAN.. Luckily my pro hair pulling skill go it out ^__^.. I wonder if it's possible to change the font of this to century gothic..
Ahhh..Time for some english nows.. Should I crank some music with my awesome roland headphones? Or just leave it with my noobie 2.1 stereo.. hmmm hard choice.. Got some new songs..Big Bang - Tonight (Album) and Pitbull ft. T-Pain - Hey Baby..
Well I'm off for some homework..or maybe discover a little more about blogspot first heh heh heh.. Cya later bruuuu xD
Wow..in chem today my friend found a hair sticking outta my cheek/chin and was like 1cm+ in length ahhaha sooo funny.. coz my bro gets them as well lmao.. My friend tried to pull it out right, and failed.. THEN MY HAIR TURNED CURLY OMG MAN.. Luckily my pro hair pulling skill go it out ^__^.. I wonder if it's possible to change the font of this to century gothic..
Ahhh..Time for some english nows.. Should I crank some music with my awesome roland headphones? Or just leave it with my noobie 2.1 stereo.. hmmm hard choice.. Got some new songs..Big Bang - Tonight (Album) and Pitbull ft. T-Pain - Hey Baby..
Well I'm off for some homework..or maybe discover a little more about blogspot first heh heh heh.. Cya later bruuuu xD
First Time.
Well Hello!
Hmmm..the title sounds wrong >_<.. Stop thinking about dirty stuff you sick minded freak ==. It's first time for me to blog oO this is weird haha it's like talking to myself except I'm typing this out for people to read.. Although no one is ever gonna read this anyway. Since my friend said blogging is for yourself and told me to blog my heart out. I will, just so I can look back every once in a while and have a little laugh by myself..like a retard. No one is ever gonna read this anyway..who wants to hear about my crappy life eh? Only me =D
Well a little about myself for you I guess. I'm Ian, nice to meet you! I'm just an average 16 year old kid, nothing special, except that I have exceptionally low self esteem. I'm blaming that on my parents, they're never satisfied with what I have acheived. I get highest mark in my class, and they're like "Only highest in your class? Why not in school?" you get the idea right? Hmm let's see.. I like playing badminton and soccer, although I'm not good at either of them haha. Yes, I do game not like hardcore game everyday though only on weekends mainly.
Well..woke up this morning and had a big arguement with Mom, then was planning to go with a friend to play some pool before badminton but ended up getting ditched. Yea, I don't have much close friends so yeah. Only a couple of them and got ditched by one today, I dno if she'll reguard me as a close friend since we've dated before and ended bad. But she's the person I turn to when I get a shitty day. Which is like everyday but yeah..anyways getting back to topic..after badminton training had some good "char siu fan" you know? Well you'd know if you're Canto.
Well I'm hoping this is okay for a first post haha..It's like 1:40am
right now. Pretty tired so yeah..maybe I'll be bored and have something to blog
about tomorrow..highly unlikely though coz I live a fairly boring life which consists of the same stuff everyday haha.. so yeah
Goodnight!
Hmmm..the title sounds wrong >_<.. Stop thinking about dirty stuff you sick minded freak ==. It's first time for me to blog oO this is weird haha it's like talking to myself except I'm typing this out for people to read.. Although no one is ever gonna read this anyway. Since my friend said blogging is for yourself and told me to blog my heart out. I will, just so I can look back every once in a while and have a little laugh by myself..like a retard. No one is ever gonna read this anyway..who wants to hear about my crappy life eh? Only me =D
Well a little about myself for you I guess. I'm Ian, nice to meet you! I'm just an average 16 year old kid, nothing special, except that I have exceptionally low self esteem. I'm blaming that on my parents, they're never satisfied with what I have acheived. I get highest mark in my class, and they're like "Only highest in your class? Why not in school?" you get the idea right? Hmm let's see.. I like playing badminton and soccer, although I'm not good at either of them haha. Yes, I do game not like hardcore game everyday though only on weekends mainly.
Well..woke up this morning and had a big arguement with Mom, then was planning to go with a friend to play some pool before badminton but ended up getting ditched. Yea, I don't have much close friends so yeah. Only a couple of them and got ditched by one today, I dno if she'll reguard me as a close friend since we've dated before and ended bad. But she's the person I turn to when I get a shitty day. Which is like everyday but yeah..anyways getting back to topic..after badminton training had some good "char siu fan" you know? Well you'd know if you're Canto.
Well I'm hoping this is okay for a first post haha..It's like 1:40am
right now. Pretty tired so yeah..maybe I'll be bored and have something to blog
about tomorrow..highly unlikely though coz I live a fairly boring life which consists of the same stuff everyday haha.. so yeah
Goodnight!
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